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Fatwa CenterResponding to a father’s advice
Question
My father often advises my husband about how to bring up our son and he, my husband, usually gets annoyed. Should I ask my father to stop his interference in our affairs?
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and messenger.
First of all, your husband should not hold you responsible for the interference of your father, simply because no one should bear the consequence of the misbehavior of others.
Furthermore, it should be taken into consideration that your father offers his advice out of mercy and affection towards you and your family. It is your obligation to be dutiful to him and treat him kindly and it is not permissible to harm him in any way. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small."}[Quran 17: 23-24]
You can politely and kindly clarify this to your father without giving him any direct orders. It is better to let your mother, sister or one of your relatives do this and explain to him that your husband gets annoyed with his endless advice and that this may affect your marriage. Other kind methods may be used as well.
Allaah Knows best.
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