Home
Discover Islam
Quran Recitations
Lectures
Fatwa
Articles
Fiqh
E-Books
Women
Boys & Girls 
Enter Question
View By Subject
Fatwa Of The Week
Selected Fatwa
Fatwa CenterHer mother does not want to forgive her for mistreating her
Question
Salaam brothers and sisters. I want to ask about my mother, I am 26years right now I used to treat her not in good manner when i was teenage and my mother is not ready to forgive me after all these years.She treats with me in a very bad way and in very bad manner different from everyone in our family. She hates me in every way that it can be. Although i asked for her forgiveness in hundreds hundreds of times but no use. My mother told me she will never forgive in her life even after her death in grave. I keep trying but no use,its been years and years am trying here. And above all she wishes all the bad wishes in this world for me Please advise me what to do?
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
Being undutiful to one’s parents is one of the most abominable and forbidden sins as we clarified in Fataawa 84942 and 87856.
However, if you had been undutiful to your mother before becoming pubescent, then you were not sinful because you were not then held accountable [as you had not yet reached the age of puberty] and your mother should know this, so she should not hold you into accountable for what you had done before you became pubescent. There is no doubt that her conduct and her refusing to forgive you is not a proper conduct because it is more appropriate for her to accept your apology and help you obey her and be dutiful to her.
As far as you are concerned, you did well by endeavoring to seek your mother’s forgiveness, and we ask Allaah to facilitate this for you. We advise you to supplicate Allaah as much as possible in order to soften her heart and make her accept your apology and forgive you, as Allaah is The All-Hearer and He answers the supplication of the one who supplicates Him.
Hence, you should be kind and soft with her in order to render her affectionate with you as in principle a mother is merciful to her children. Also, you may seek the help of some of her female friends who may influence her.
If she does not respond, you should supplicate Allaah on her behalf as much as possible and ask Him to forgive her, and you should also do other kinds of acts of being kind to her while she is alive and after her death hoping that Allaah would make her pleased with you.
For more benefit on how to be kind and dutiful to the parents in their life and after their death, please refer to Fataawa 82254 and 83233.
Allaah Knows best.
Search Fatwa
Fatwa Subject
