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Fatwa CenterA Wife’s Obligation to Respond to Her Husband’s Sexual Needs
Question
Is it permissible for a wife to masturbate his husband as he is not ready for sex in 3 month of marriage. He says he can't do it while simultaneously want his wife to give him pleasure from other means. Is wife allowed to say no if she doesn't like it.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
It is permissible for a husband to masturbate with his wife’s hand. Ibn ‘Abidin
said in his Hashiyah ‘Ala Al-Durr Al-Mukhtar: “It is permissible for him to masturbate with his wife’s hand …” End quote.
Al-Nawawi said in Rawdat Al-Talibin: “It is permissible for him to masturbate with his wife’s hand, just as he may enjoy the rest of her body.” End quote.
As for whether the wife is obliged to obey her husband if he asks her to do this, we have not come across any statement of the scholars specifically addressing this issue. However, the jurists stated that a wife is obliged to obey her husband with regard to sexual enjoyment other than vaginal intercourse. Some of them have stated that it is obligatory for the wife to obey her husband if he commands her to do something permissible by which sexual enjoyment is attained. Al-Nawawi said in his commentary on Sahih Muslim: “This is evidence that it is forbidden for her to refuse sexual relations with him without a legitimate excuse. Menstruation is not an excuse for refusing, because he has the right to enjoy her above the waist.” End quote.
Accordingly, if this act does not cause you any harm, then it is more prudent for you to obey your husband in this regard.
Know that it is obligatory upon your husband to satisfy your sexual needs to the extent of his ability. If what prevents him from satisfying you is an illness, then he should seek treatment from qualified specialists so that he may become able to satisfy you. Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah said: “It is obligatory upon a man to have intercourse with his wife in a proper manner, and this is among the most emphasized of her rights over him, greater than providing her with food. The obligatory intercourse has been said to be once every four months, and it has also been said that it is according to her need and his ability, just as he provides her with food according to her need and his ability. This is the more correct of the two opinions. And Allah knows best.” End quote from Al-Fatawa Al-Kubra.
It was narrated from Usamah Ibn Sharik 
that the Messenger of Allah said: “Seek treatment, for Allah, the Almighty, has not sent down a disease without also sending down a cure for it, except for one disease: old age.” [Abu Dawood]
Al-Qurtubi said in his Tafsir: “If a man finds himself unable to fulfill her rights regarding intercourse, he should take medicines that increase his sexual potency and strengthen his desire until he satisfies her.” End quote.
Allah Knows best
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