Depressed about his height and looks
1-12-2005 | IslamWeb
Question:
I feel really happy and thank you for putting up such a nice website. May Allaah reward you for this Aameen. My problem is rather quite complicated but it needs to be overcome or the depression would kill me inside. Allaah has given me everything Al-Hamdulillaah. And I am a five time praying Muslim Mashaa' Allaah. As I am 26-years old now Mashaa' Allaah, I am only 5\'7 inches tall. Whenever I see someone taller than me of my age, I really feel depressed and this feeling keeps on getting stronger day by day. I feel if this continues to be the same, this depression would kill me one day.
The other problem which causes me to feel lonely and down quite often, and I know this is an act of Shaytaan, is that whenever I go out, and no females look at me or take my attention, makes me feel depressed. I know this is a sinful act and I shouldn't feel like this, but to be honest, I try a lot not to feel like that and not to look at females, but eventually I end up looking at them and when I don't get a response I feel like I am ugly and ordinary type of guy which makes me feel really tensed and depressed due to which I feel like doing nothing at all in life and just kill myself or to run away from this world where no one is present. Please let me know if there is any Du'aa or Dhikr to overcome all this situation of tension and depression I am going through. Please help me out here I really need it.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
Know, dear brother, that there is no mention of Allaah or supplication that is said when one is in tension, as far as we know. However, Allaah promised to answer the supplication of whoever supplicates him. Allaah Says (which means): {And your Lord says, "Call upon Me; I will respond to you.}[Quran 40:60]. Allaah further Says (which means): {And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me, indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to Me [by obedience] and believe in Me that they may be [rightly] guided.}[Quran 2:186].
As regards the supplications that could be said at the time of hardship and grief, the Prophet 
said: "Shall I not teach you some words to say when you feel distressed, if you say it, Allah will drive away your anguish and grief? The companions 
replied: "Please do, O Prophet of Allaah!" He said: "It is the words of Prophet Yoonus [i.e. Jonah]: "Laa ilaaha illa anta subhanaka innee kuntu minath-thalimeen". "None has the right to be worshipped except You; exalted are You. Indeed, I have been of the wrongdoers." [Quran 21:87][An-Nasaa'ee] Moreover, it is reported that in times of difficulty and grief, the Prophet used to supplicate as follows: "Laa ilaaha illallaah al'-atheem al-haleem, laa ilaaha illallaah rabbus-samaawaati wal-ardh wa rabbul 'arshil-'atheem." Al-'Atheem (which implies Greatness), Al-Haleem (which implies Forbearing). None has the right to be worshipped except Allaah, The Lord of the Magnificent Throne. None has the right to be worshipped except Allaah, The Lord of the heavens and the Earth and The Lord of the noble Throne." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
Furthermore, Asmaa' Bint 'Umays 
said: "The Prophet said: "Shall I not teach you some words to say when you feel distressed: "Allaahu Rabbi, Laa Ushriku Bihee Shay'aa (Allaah is my Lord, and I do not associate anything with Him)." [Abu Daawood]
You have to know that a person is not judged according to his height but according to his piety and moral conduct. Allaah Says (which means): {Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allaah is the most righteous of you.}[Quran 49:13]. Besides, the Prophet was asked: "Who is the most honourable of men?" He replied: "The most honourable of men is the most righteous." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim] Also, the Prophet was asked: "What is the characteristic that makes people enter paradise the most?" and he replied: ''The fear of Allaah and good moral character." [Ahmad] So we advise you to lower your gaze from what Allaah has forbidden and you are obliged to do so. You should not worry about not being tall enough. Rather, you should purify your soul and restrict yourself to Allaah's obedience; as it is only those who purify their own selves who are successful. As-Safaareeni
said: 'What is important in a person is a good moral character and conduct and not his clothes and appearance.'
Allaah Knows best.