The children believe their parents are in a bad marriage
19-12-2004 | IslamWeb
Question:
My parents have throughout their marriage always argued and never liked each other and they have made us really miserable. They have reached divorce many times. Lately, things have gotten worse and although I have tried to keep them together and calm them down so many times they just hate each other. My brothers are now thinking that the best thing is to do is take my mum to live with them i.e. separate them. If they did this I am sure my dad will divorce her for real. I don't know what to do, I tell them its wrong but they think they are 'saving' her from him because he treats her really bad and they say they are doing it out of mercy for her. I do not want this to happen because I feel its Haraam to come between a man and his wife, and I do not approve of what my brothers will do but at the same time I too feel really bad that my mum is suffering with him. What do I do in a situation like this? What does Islam have to say about 'saving' someone from a bad marriage even if it is one of your parents?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
Allaah legislated marriage in order to achieve high objectives, the most important of which is stability within the family, so that it can instill the correct and real meaning of worship to Allaah Alone, and lead to population the Earth. The most important way to achieve this is for the husband and wife to observe their obligations towards each other and fulfil the rights that Allaah has ordered them to fulfil. Allaah says (which means): {And women shall have rights similar to the rights against them, according to what is equitable.}[2:228]. There is no doubt that the arguments that your parents are having is a great affliction, so we advise you to be patient and fear Allaah in their regard and advise them. You can also seek the help of righteous and pious people of your family and others in order to reconcile them. If they succeed to do so then all perfect praise be to Allaah, otherwise even if your father is mistreating your mother, you still have to be kind and dutiful to him. Moreover, it is not permissible for your brothers to take your mother away from the house of your father without his permission because that could worsen the problem. However, it is permissible for your mother, if she fears any harm, to consult an Islamic centre or organization to look into the matter and remove the harm from her.
Allaah knows best.