After knowing her past he promised marriage, but abandoned her

19-7-2004 | IslamWeb

Question:

I want to know if a person promises to marry you and simply abandons you and is not in touch anymore what is the fatwa regarding this. After knowing my past life he promises and then goes away, does this mean he's afraid of my past then why did he promise?

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Answer:

Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.

You have to know, dear sister, that there is nothing that takes place in this world except what Allah has decreed. Whatever Allah wishes takes place, and whatever Allah does not wish, does not take place. It is possible that Allah knows that this man who promised to marry you is not suitable for you, that’s why he took Him away from you. You have to remember the saying of Allah: "And it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know." (Al-Baqarah 2:216)

So ask Allah for a pious husband who will protect your religion and take care of you. You have to make Istikharah about any person who proposes to marry you, and seek advice of the wise people in your family.

You will not be disappointed if you make Istikharah and you will not regret if you consult people. Nevertheless, you have committed a mistake in two regards:

Discussing with this man who is alien to you (without the presence of one of your male Mahram) is not permissible, as this is not free from religious prohibitions.

You informed him about things that you should not have informed him about. A Muslim has to cover himself if he commits any disgraceful act.

You have to repent to Allah from these two matters in particular, and from all other sins in general, and we advise you not to think about this man. We ask Allah to grant you a good husband.

Allah knows best.