Father Threatens to Disown Son If He Gets Married
12-4-2003 | IslamWeb
Question:
When I was a student I agreed married a classmate after graduation. His parents are separated! After graduation his mother came and visited me at home with my family and ask for her son to come and propose to me! He actually came and met my father and proposed to me legally. He asked my father to wait until he is ready financially for marriage! All that happened with his father's will and approval. We kept like that for along time and then my colleague told me that his father does not agree about getting engaged now but at least after 6 years later and told him "if you complete this marriage without me you will not be my son any longer and there will be no contact between me and mother or little sisters and will never talk to them again". My colleague is still trying with his father patiently but I want to ask if his father insists on his opinion and my colleague came to complete our marriage will this be considered as a sin or disobedience to his father which may cause Allah's Anger? Note: His father never saw me.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, know that the consent of the father is not a condition for the validity of the marriage of his son. But it is more appropriate and more suitable that your colleague does his best to please his father by convincing him of this marriage and clarifying to him the harmful effects of delaying it for a longer time. In fact, any delay can drive this colleague to temptations which may result in committing what is forbidden.
Moreover, if his father's refusal is not due to a legal reason, then it is but obstinacy. This will cause his son to lose an advantage and, in this case, his father commits a sin.
Anyway, we prefer that your colleague does not get married without the consent of his father and the other members of his family. If his father insists on his stand, it is better to fulfill his father's desire although this is not obligatory. But pleasing one's father is pleasing Allah. No doubt that if Allah is pleased with someone, He will grant him means that he never expected.
Allah knows best.