Insists Husband Should Be College Educated

13-10-2002 | IslamWeb

Question:

There is this man that I'm planning to marry. He has good character and is a practicing Muslim. But the problem is he doesn't think a college education is an important part of life. I think it is and I want him to go to college to be educated and I want to respect him both for his knowledge and practice of the Dean and for other types of knowledge. If he doesn't finish school then I don't think I should marry him. I know that the most important thing is that he is a practicing Muslim and he does take the Dean very seriously. But I can't help but think that a college degree is an important ingredient. Am I crazy? I just don't know if I should go ahead with this marriage or not.

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

The woman has the right to marry the man she likes; the man she feels happy and comfortable with. But the basis for choosing the husband should be his religion and morals. The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: “If a man whose religion and moral conduct are pleasing to you proposes to you, then let him marry; otherwise there will be great mischief and corruption on earth.” [At-Tirmithi]

The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) also urged men to marry pious women.

No doubt that knowledge has a great place in this religion. Allah Says (what means):

• {Allah will raise those who have believed among you and those who were given knowledge, by degrees. And Allah is Acquainted with what you do.} [Quran 58: 11]

• {Say, “Are those who know equal to those who do not know?”} [Quran 39: 9]

So, the scientific degrees and diplomas are among the complimentary assets, but they should not be regarded as being the most important. In fact, his piety and good character should be the basis for your decision. However, we think that it would be better if this man completes his studies and gets higher degree.

So, if this man is pious and has a good character, then you could marry him after having performed Istikhaarah prayer and after having asked some of your wise relatives about him. But know that marriage cannot be valid unless with the consent of the Wali (guardian) and the presence of two witnesses.

For more benefit on how to perform Istikhaarah and how to supplicate Allah, please refer to Fataawa 172573, 81434, and 82964.

Allah knows best.

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