Father does not approve of her marital choice

29-9-2002 | IslamWeb

Question:

I am in love with someone and he has the same feelings towards me too. We decided to get married but my father is refusing and he actually wants me to marry someone else, because he is 15 years older and has kids (he is divorced) I really don't know what am I suppose to do I can't imagine my life with someone other than the one I love and also I can't be a bad daughter and disobey my father.

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Answer:

Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the World; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.

You have to obey your parents; your success is only in obeying your parents. Know that your obedience to them brings happiness and pleasure for you. So, give up your desire, subjecting it to their will. In fact, they have better knowledge than you about what will benefit you. Probably, your deep love to this person may prevent you from reaching the truth. There is a proverb says that 'your deep affection to something makes you deaf and blind so you do not perceive its disadvantages'. Deep love gets one to shut his eyes to the faults and shortcomings of the beloved while others can see them very clearly. Know that such love is not permitted in Islam, particularly if it leads to being alone with him, meeting him, or the like.
It is agreed that being alone with an alien man is forbidden in Sharia. The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: "No man should stay with a lady in seclusion except in the presence of a Mahram" [Reported by Imams Bukhari and Muslim ].
The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) also said: "No man ever stays alone with a woman but Satan becomes their third companion" [ Ahmad , al-Hakim and said it is sound Hadith and suits the conditions made by al-Bukhari and Muslim ].
We ask Allah to guide all of us to the right path.
Allah knows best.