Wife wants more children
10-8-2000 | IslamWeb
Question:
As Salaamu Alaikum. I am a 31 years old married Muslimah. My husband and I have one daughter who is almost 2 years old. I would like to have more children now, but my husband says he is not ready to have another child. Is it not my Islamic right (just as it would be his) to more children when I want them? Thank you for your answer.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
Muslim scholars have confirmed that a wife has the same right to have children as her husband. For that reason, those scholars who permitted coitus interruption set the wife's consent as a condition to practice it, lest she would lose, without a legal reason, her right in giving birth. The husband should know that the Islamic Sharee'ah urges Muslims to increase their offspring. Children are the allurements of the life of this world. Allaah Says (what means): {Beautified for men is the love of things they covet; women, children, much of gold and silver (wealth), branded beautiful horses, cattle and well-tilled land. This is the pleasure of the present world's life; but Allaah has the excellent return (Paradise, etc.) with Him.}[Quran 3:14]
A virtuous child is actually a continuous blessing for his parents. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam , said: “When a man dies, his deeds come to an end, except for three: A continuous charity, knowledge by which people receive benefits, and a pious child who prays for him." A person does not know whether the blessings are in the first child he has had or in the last ones, especially if one does not have a male child, as mentioned by the questioner. No doubt that whoever does not have a male child his progeny would be cut off. No wise person would like being cut off. He would spend whatever he could to gain a child, if he were sterile. Some people believe that a large number of children become a burden and cause difficulties in life. These are delusions and nothing else because Allaah Says (what means): {We shall provide sustenance for them as well as for you.}[Quran 17: 31] The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “You are helped and endowed with sustenance for your weak people.” There is no doubt that small children are among such weak people.
The Prophet Zakariyya's supplication was: {And (remember) Zakariyya (Zachariah), when he cried to his Lord, “O My Lord, leave me not single (childless), though You are the Best of the Inheritors.”}[Quran 21: 89] and He said: {At that time Zakariyya (Zachariya) invoked his Lord, saying: "O my Lord, grant me from You, a good offspring. You are indeed the All-Hearer of invocation.”}[Quran: 3:38] One does not know what may happen to him; he may be infected with a disease or become impotent; then he may wish to have a child when he is unable to have one. Overall, there are countless benefits of having children, so one should not try to prevent this blessing.
Allaah Knows best.