By no means should a sin turn into self-defeatism
23-1-2014 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalaamu Alaykum,
Briefly, I had an affair with a man of ill morals but I did not know that. I committed an immorality that is considered one of the grave major sins. But I did not know that the corporal punishment prescribed for that crime is stoning to death. After that, Allaah Almighty Blessed me with a religious man of good morals, who knows his religion well and further draws me to Obedience to Allaah. But I feel guilty towards him and have the impression that I do not deserve him, which causes me to be in dispute with him, for I feel terribly guilty, because I am his first woman, and I am afraid of telling him anything. I also ask for the Forgiveness of Allaah every day and night and persist in prayer. Would Allaah Accept my repentance? By Allaah, I am extremely regretful, and I fear the Punishment of Allaah, to the extent that whenever I remember my Fear of Allaah, I weep ceaselessly, not for fear of the fire in so much as out of shyness of the sin I committed. Would Allaah Accept my repentance?
May Allaah Reward you.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
The questioner mentioned that she had committed an immorality belonging to the grave major sins. Being so, it is incumbent upon her to hasten to turn in sincere repentance to Allaah, by giving up that grave major sin, showing regret for committing it, and deciding not to do it again. Then, she should pray more for forgiveness, multiply righteous deeds, and supplicate Allaah Almighty to Help her obey Him. She also has to conceal her previous sins, and not tear the Screen of Allaah, in compliance with the statement of the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam: "Whoever is afflicted by any of those vile things, let him conceal it by the Screen of Allaah, the Exalted." [Al-Haakim]
Concerning the upright person whom she knows now, if he is her husband, she will have to obey him in what leads to no disobedience to Allaah Almighty, deal with him kindly, and benefit from his praiseworthy characteristics. If he is her suitor, and intends to marry her, she will have to accept him as a husband, and not let her previous sins prevent her from that, for whoever repents, Allaah Accepts his repentance, and whoever sincerely repents of a sin is like the one who has never committed such a sin.
As for her fear and grief because of her shyness of committing that grave major sin, this is not right. Rather, one's fear and grief should be because of the apprehension of the Punishment of Allaah Almighty for committing something that contradicts His Sharee‘ah.