Dutifulness to parents takes priority over giving charity

13-8-2012 | IslamWeb

Question:

I have A Very Imp. ques. I Am 18.5 Yrs old & have Recently Completed my A – Levels (In may / June 2010). I want To give Charity & To meet my other Expenses. I Am an Expert In mathematics & So Decided To Teach It To my Juniors (i.e. O & A Levels). But my Jealous, hypocrite & So – Called parents Refused To help me In This Regard. They Neither give Charity Nor help others (me) To Do So. They Don’t Read quran & prefer This material world over & Above Allah’s Commandants. I Am NOT Concerned About Them bcz They have Rejected Truth & Are people given To wrong. when I myself Tried To Advertise To Students, They Even Interfered In It In (- ve) way bcz of Reasons mentioned Above. So I Decided To Teach online without Letting Them Know. But I Don’t Know how To Advertise & Teach online & They Ask To pay An Initial Cost Via Credit Card which I haven’t made Yet! I Desperately & Earnestly want To Teach & give Charity. what Should I Do. give Reasons, Details, Explanations For Your Ans.,

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Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.

First of all, you should know that you should be polite when talking about your parents, and your statement about them being “so called parents” implies rudeness with your parents and it might be severing the ties of kinship with them. Also, if by your statement “I am not concerned about them” you mean that you are not obedient to them and that you do not fulfill their rights, then this is cutting the ties of kinship with them.

Besides, it is not permissible for you to accuse them of hypocrisy, so you should fear Allaah and you should know that you are obliged to be kind and dutiful to them even if they are non-Muslims, let alone when they are Muslims. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 134798.

On the other hand, we are surprised why you are keen to work so that you would give charity while you are not keen to be kind and dutiful to your parents whereas being kind and dutiful to them is an obligation and giving charity is only desirable. Indeed, this is nothing but the deception of the devil. So, the matter is clear and there is no need to mention the reasons, details and clarifications which you mentioned but what the situation requires is that you should seek the forgiveness of Allaah and repent to Him, and you should be kind to your parents when asking what you want.

Dear brother, if you want to work in order to fulfill your necessary needs, then you should be polite when asking the permission of your parents; if they give you permission to work, then you can work but if they don’t give you permission, you may work even without their consent. Your parents have no right to prevent you from making money and earning a living as long as you are an adult and of sound mind as mentioned by the scholars .  Al-Haytami   said in his book entitled “Al-Fataawa Al-Fiqhiyyah Al-Kubra”: “If it is proved that the child has attained maturity, in the sense that he is a person of good religion and can handle his financial matters properly, then the father has no right to prevent him from what benefits him in his religion and his worldly affairs.”

Allaah Knows best.