Her non-Muslim father favored his girlfriend over her
19-12-2011 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalamu alaykum.My parents are divorced.I used to live with my mom but I couldnt stay with her cuz she was abusing me mentally n physically.I talked to my dad and he agreed on stay with him n continue school there.Few months after my dad bought a house where I found out he had a girlfriend n she was going to live with us.after sometime living there She will turn off the heat if I was home alone.I got sick many times cuz of this.She insulted,lied n accused me of hitting her,causing problems between me n my dad.She even called the police 3 times in which one of those times the police forced me to leave in my pijamas,no money, tempature below zero and snowing.i called my father to come do something n he told me he was busy at work.n for now the only solution was for me to leave. Knowing I had nowhere to go.My dad has even asked me to leave the house.I Never did something to dissipoint him.After some time I converted to islam.In the beginning I ddnt tell him to not cause more problems.When he found out.He called me an extremist for wearing hijab.He slaped me and draged me around the living room from my hair,he has called me bad names infront of friends.He has cursed me n said meanful things that noone has ever said to me.Im hurt, is hard to forget all this abuse From my mom n dad,sad cuz he always defended his girlfriend.I got married few months ago. He knows my situation n how depressed I am about all this.The fights between me n dad had stop since I got married.until last month he came to my home n we had a fight,cuz he knew I was very sad n dad blamed my religion n hijab to be the cause of my sadness.He told me I was jealous of his lifestyle n called me a terrorist n almost hit me infront of my husband.now I dont know wat to do I love my parents dearly but I cant forgive them.my mother refuses to talk w/me after wat happened with my dad.is hard for me to anwers his phone calls now after all the pain he caused me.im lost,sad n afraid allah will punish me. guide me pl
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, we thank and praise Allaah who guided you to Islam and we ask Him to make you firm and steadfast on His religion until the Day you meet Him.
We advise you to seek beneficial knowledge, perform good deeds and befriend righteous and pious women, as these are the best things that would help a Muslim woman remain steadfast on the religion.
As regards your question, if the harm of your parents to you that you mentioned in the question has really happened, then this is an outrageous injustice and this is contrary to the Fitrah (the natural predisposition upon which Allaah created mankind) of mercy and kindness upon which Allaah created the parents towards their children. However, their right upon their children in being kind and dutiful to them still remains in all circumstances, and even if they are non-Muslims as we clarified in Fataawa 84942 and 82254.
It appears that your becoming a Muslim has made your father angrier and that is why he has become more insulting to you and disputes with you. Perhaps your father and your mother may endeavor to harm you even more. So, we advise you to be patient and forgiving and face perform their bad treatment with kindness, as this is one of the great morals of Islam. Indeed, such morals may lead your father and mother to embrace Islam. For more benefit on the excellence of patience, please refer to Fatwa 83577 and to Fatwa 84351 on the merits of forgiveness.
We also advise you to supplicate to Allaah to guide them to Islam and you should call them to it if possible, otherwise, you may seek the help of someone who may call them to it. For more on calling the parents to Islam, please refer to Fataawa 83566 and 85180.
Moreover, you should know that the way of Allaah is everlasting in regard to afflicting the former people with trials as well as the latter people, in order to make evident who amongst them are the true believers and so that He would destroy the disbelievers, and so that the true believers will be distinguished from the hypocrites, and the good people will be distinguished from the bad ones; Allaah Says (what means): {Do the people think that they will be left to say, "We believe," and they will not be tried? But We have certainly tried those before them, and Allaah will surely make evident those who are truthful, and He will surely make evident the liars.}[Quran 29:2-3]
Indeed, you have an excellent model in the Prophet 
and in his Companions 
as they were harmed more than anybody else when they believed in Allaah alone and abandoned the misguidance of the people of the pre-Islamic era of Ignorance. For example, the Prophet used to be harmed in words and actions by the closest people to him: his uncle Abu Lahab and his uncle's wife Umm Jameel. Abu Lahab used to mock him and describe him as a madman, and Umm Jameel used to put thorns and rubbish at the Prophet’s door, and the Prophet would forgive them and overlook what they did to him.
In another incident, the polytheists threw some rotten rubbish on the Prophet’s back while he was in prayer and in the position of prostration, and he patiently bore it. Another story is about Abu Jandal Ibn Suhayl, who embraced Islam on the day of the Hudaybiyyah (treaty) and his father Suhayl – who was at that time a non-Muslim – stood up and slapped him on his face, and he seized him by his collar and dragged him back to the polytheists. Abu Jandal, may Allaah be pleased with him, shouted with his loudest voice, “O Muslims, would you allow that I be taken back to the polytheists who would afflict me in my religion?" Upon this the Prophet said to him: “O Abu Jundal, be patient and seek the reward from Allaah as Allaah will make a way out of your difficulties for you those weak people with you. This is because we signed a treaty between us and these people and we both promised Allaah to respect it, so we cannot be unfaithful to them.”
Also, it is worth mentioning here – from among the women –Sumayyah Bint Khayyaat, Umm ‘Aamaar, who was the wife of Yaasir . The polytheists punished her along with her husband and son to the extent that Abu Jahl cut open her stomach and killed her while she was pregnant. Their only sin was that they believed in Allaah The Mighty, The Honorable and The Praiseworthy.
After all this, the outcome [victory] was for the believers: they achieved glory, victory, sovereignty and succession to authority upon the earth. This lasted for centuries until the nation lost its religion by failing to abide by it whereas they had once achieved great achievements and development; Allaah Says (what means): {Indeed, he who fears Allaah and is patient, then indeed, Allaah does not allow to be lost the reward of those who do good.}[Quran 12:90] Allaah also Says (what means): {…And the [best] outcome is for [those of] righteousness.}[Quran 20:132]
Allaah Knows best.