Her husband mocks her and tortures her mentally
21-6-2009 | IslamWeb
Question:
my question is that my husband has a torturing behavior towards me. i m passing through the roughest time i.e., 9th month of my pregnancy. he takes fun in saying bad about my brother, sisters and family, i feel that he is complexed. moreover, he has also started doubting at me. i can't bear this as i am already in the boiling water and need him in this time. i have a 14months baby also, and do everything at my own. i have been justifyiing with all his duties, maintain his relations, take care of him and his demands. but he has been teasing me right from the marriage by picking out useless faults in my appearance, my family members and infact in everything. i m at a foreign land and have no one to look after or spend time with, just the four walls of the house and can't move out, he does not even gives money to manage relations infact has mine with him. i want to ask that what should i do in such a situation. he makes me lose my temper. i am worried for my kids as i am aware of the aftereffects of such circumstances. actually, he has also been the victim of this father-mother fights. at times, he leaves me crying for hours taking it normal and that too in such a condition. i feel that my nerves will break one day. kindly guide me in this situation.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
If what you mentioned about your husband is correct, then he is disobedient to his Lord and he badly affects the marital relations with his wife; Allaah Says (what means): {And live with them in kindness.}[Quran 4:19] Therefore, we advise him to fear Allaah and to know that Allaah is able to take revenge on him because of him wronging his wife. Does he not know that Allaah Says (what means): {But if they [i.e. the wives] obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allaah is ever Exalted and Grand.}[Quran 4:34] Furthermore, the Prophet said: “Treat your wives kindly because they are like prisoners in your hands.” [Ahmad, At-Tirmithi and Ibn Maajah] For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 88304.
Furthermore, it is absolutely not permissible for him to suspect his wife without evidence; Allaah Says (what means): {O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin}[Quran 49:12]
Moreover, he is obliged to spend on his wife and children and he is not permitted to take anything from the money of his wife without her consent; the Prophet said: “It is not permissible to take someone’s money except with his consent.” [Ahmad]
Therefore, we advise you to be patient with him and supplicate Allaah to rectify him, and it is permissible to seek the help of some pious and righteous people to advise him if necessary. Then, if his situation with you becomes better, then this is what is required, but if he continues to behave in the same way and you fear harm by staying with him as a wife, then you are permitted to ask for divorce even by paying him compensation. Allaah may grant you with a better husband afterwards; Allaah Says (what means): {But if they separate [by divorce], Allaah will enrich each [of them] from His abundance. And ever is Allaah Encompassing and Wise.}[Quran 4:130]
Finally, we advise you to be wise and you and your husband should not raise problems in front of the children as this negatively affects them in their life in general.
Allaah Knows best.