Afraid to neglect her husband if she resides with her sick mother
13-5-2008 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalaamu alikkum i got married to a person as a second wife and he already have a first wife . now my mother has become a hospitalization ad she si sic and she is 60 years old , i have one younger sister she is unmarried but she is working// and i have left my baby (first husband`s) with my mom only/// now my mom is not feeling well and she insists me to stay with her to take care but i live with my husband and mother in law away from 900 kilometer from my mom`s place/// but my mother in law says that if i live and go my husband and stay with my mom my husband will not be so affection and he will live only with his first wife and and will not come to see me also often, so she is frightening me like this// but i have a confidence on my husband, already he has a misunderstading with his first wife and he got married to me and he is very happy with me, but i dnt know what to do now, my mom and baby is is away from me and no borthers also we are only two girls for my mom, so we have to take care of my mom, i dnt have father also, please clear my doubt, whether i can stay with my mom and baby and let my husband come every month or every two months to see me and he is also interested to stay with his first wife and children. so i can sacrifice , please clear my doubt.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu 'alyhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, we advise you to discuss the matter with your husband as he may give you permission to go and reside with your mother. If he agrees, then we hope that Allaah will recompense you with something better than staying with your husband. However, if he does not agree, it is not permissible for you to go without his permission because the rights of the husband take priority over the rights of the parents when they clash. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 85169.
Also, you may consult with your sister about looking for a trustworthy maid who would take care of your mother.
For further details, please refer to Fatwas 84529 and 87019.
Allaah Knows best.