Her Relations with Men

02/04/2009| IslamWeb

Being in seclusion

Obedience to Allah can only be achieved by following His commands and keeping away from what He Has prohibited. One way in which the Muslim woman obeys Allah and His Messenger is by not sitting in seclusion with a "non-Mahram" because it is prohibited on the basis of the narration in which the Prophet ; said: "A man should not sit with a woman unless a Mahram is with her, and a woman should not travel without a Mahram." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim] The Mahram is a man to whom marriage is forever forbidden for a woman due to blood relations (such as the father, brother, paternal or maternal uncle, etc.), suckling or marriage (like ones mother-in-law or step daughter under certain cases),

A "non-Mahram" is a man to whom marriage is allowed in principle, even if he is a relative, especially the husband's brother and other similarly close relatives. It is forbidden for a woman to sit alone with all of these, because the Prophet said: "Beware of entering upon women." A man of the Ansaar asked, "O Messenger of Allah what about the brother-in-law?" He said, "The brother-in-law is (as dangerous as) death."

The brother-in-law is the husband's brother or other similarly close relatives by marriage. The Prophet's words, " The brother-in-law is (as dangerous as) death" mean that evil is more likely to occur from these quarters than from elsewhere, because of the ease with which he enters his brother's house. The word "death" is used for emphasis and as a sharp warning, as if sitting alone with the brother-in-law may lead to immorality and calamitous consequences that would be akin to the calamity of death.

The true Muslim woman does not fall into such errors as are committed by so many careless people nowadays.

Mixing with Men

The true Muslim woman avoids mixing with men; she does not pursue it or encourage it. Thus she follows the example of the women in the household of the Prophet, the women of the Salaf (righteous predecessors), and those who followed their way sincerely.

The harm that may occur as a result of free mixing is now becoming clear to Westerners who have practiced free mixing on the widest scale. They have seen that it leads to a fall in standards of education, so they have now begun to segregate male and female students in some universities and institutes of education, as stated by the principal of a girls' elementary school in Belgium when asked about the reason why boys and girls do not mix at this level of education? She replied, "We noticed the harm that mixing can to do children even at the elementary level."

Moreover, Russia had reached a similar conclusion, and had established separate, segregated branches of universities, where male and female students did not mix.

There are more than 170 university branches in which male and female students do not mix. They were set up because the educators and supervisors noticed the harm that was caused by mixing, even in a society that is used to mixing in every area of social life.

The evidence of the harm caused by mixing is too vast to be enumerated. All of it points to the wisdom of Islam in putting an end to mixing, and protecting the Muslim societies which adhere to Islamic guidance from its destructive, harmful effects.

Shaking Hands with Men

It is natural that a Muslim woman who does not mix with men would not shake hands with anyone who is not her Mahram, in accordance with the teaching and example of the Prophet `Aa'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said: "When the believing women made Hijrah to the Prophet he would examine and test them, in accordance with the verse (which means): {O you who believe! When there come to you believing women refugees, examine [and test] them'. . .}[Quran 60:10] Whoever accepted these conditions required of the believing women has thereby accepted their pledge. When the Messenger of Allah accepted their words, he told them (the women), `You may go now, for I have accepted your pledge.' By Allah, the Prophet's hand never touched the hand of a woman; he accepted their pledge by words only. By Allah, he never put any conditions on women other than those that Allah commanded him, and when he had confirmed the pledge he would say `I have accepted you Bay`ah by your words.'" [Al-Bukhari]

Traveling

One of the rulings of Islam concerning women is that a woman should not travel without a Mahram, because travel is full of dangers and hardships and it is not right for a woman to face all this alone, without a Mahram to protect her and take care of her. So the Prophet forbade women to travel alone without a Mahram as recorded in numerous Hadeeth, such as:

"A woman should not travel for three days except with a Mahram."

"It is not permitted for a woman who believes in Allah and the Last Day to travel the walking-distance of three days without a Mahram."

All the Hadeeth on this topic state that the presence of a Mahram is the condition for women's travel, except in cases of utter necessity as defined by the scholars, whose points of view differ somewhat.

In this way the Muslim woman is truly obedient to Allah, following His commands, heeding His prohibitions, and accepting His rulings. She adheres to the teachings of Islam and bears with patience any difficulties that may be involved in obeying Allah, even if this goes against many of the prevalent social ideas. She is filled with hope that she will ultimately be successful and victorious, as the Quran states (what means): {By [the Token of] Time [through the Ages], Verily Man is in loss, Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and [join together] in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy.}[Quran 103:1-3]