Don't shop 'til you drop

02/04/2009| IslamWeb

You know who you are. You swing by Target on your way home from dropping the kids off to school. You have got the date of Nordstrom's Half Yearly sale marked on your calendar. Many of the mall store owners and workers recognize you and wave as you rush by. Yeah, you know who you are.

How much of your day is spent shopping or how many days out of the week do you go shopping? If you don't like your own answer, then it is time to reevaluate your shopping and spending habits.

 

The Prophet said: "Each one of you is a trustee (shepherd) and is accountable for that which is entrusted to him. A ruler is trustee and is accountable for his trust, a man is a trustee in respect of his family, and a woman is a trustee in respect of her husband's house and children." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim] As the trustee of her husband's home and children, the wife and mother of the family is the one responsible for guarding the family's money and savings while her husband is busy earning. This does not mean that a woman cannot also contribute to the family income; it simply defines the woman's responsibility. It is her duty to spend the family's money wisely and not foolishly. It is her duty to be resourceful and thrifty, not wasteful and thoughtless.

 

Be a smart shopper

 

Being the financial trustee means being a wise spender, a smart shopper. A woman in this position will check the mail for flyers and coupons, planning out her week's meals based on what is on sale. A woman in this position will buy her children's clothes and shoes off-season, stocking up for next year at drastically discounted prices.

 

Shopping smart is not difficult, but it does take discipline. Some tips to consider when trying to save money:

 

1. Make a list. If you have a list before entering a supermarket, you are more likely to get just what you need. If you walk in unarmed, you will probably walk out laden with things you really didn't need. 
2. Distribute your purchasing. Some months, it is helpful to spread out the shopping. If you can spread the expenses over a couple or three weeks, you can avoid making a huge dent in the budget. This works especially well with Warehouse Shopping (like Costco and Sam's Club). These stores can rack up a huge bill quickly.
3.  Beware of multiple purchase discounts. Many stores offer discounts on multiple purchases. For instance, you can save $1 on three boxes of cereal. It sounds like a bargain, but what if you only need one box? The $1 saved is not worth it if your budget is for only one box of cereal.
4.  Avoid department store gimmicks. Almost every department store in the country has a variation of member savings offered for new accounts. A 10-15% all-day savings is attractive and quickly entices buyers into signing up for the store card. This ultimately encourages the new cardholder to buy a lot to save a little.

 

Be a reliable saver

 

In addition to being a smart shopper, a woman should be a strong saver. Many fortunate women have the blessing of being home with the kids, not needing to work to supplement their husband's income. These women, though they may not earn the money, are the ones responsible for making sure that the money is spent appropriately.

 

A good trustee is one who will guard her family's money and make wise decisions about how to save. She will help her husband increase their wealth and not diminish it. To save means not only spending frugally, but avoiding spending altogether. In many instances, a woman has the choice between buying something or passing it by. Before you reach for that adorable new sweater for your darling little daughter, think about how long she will wear it. If it is already June, you know she won't get much use out of it and it is ultimately a purchase that you can forgo.

 

Another way of saving the family's money is to perhaps spend your own when the need arises. Some moms say that they do well with a little `petty cash' fund that they have for themselves. Having access to this small amount of money can give a woman freedom to spend on herself without the guilt of dipping into the family pot. Although this seems like an added expense instead of a savings, if it is a reasonable amount that is mutually agreeable, it might be beneficial. For example, if a husband and wife agree on a $25 a month allowance, then that money is hers to spend in what she likes. This way she alleviates that desire to shop for herself without having to face the consequences of making an unbudgeted purchase. Of course, this desire should never get uncontrollable. Islam urges moderation in everything-shopping is no exception.

 

Be a good example

Once you have mastered smart spending and wise saving, share the wealth of this acquired knowledge. Teach your children how to handle money, both when spending and when saving. Stay-at-home moms especially need to teach the kids that just because mom doesn't go to work to make money, that doesn't mean that she doesn't know how to manage it.

 

Some families believe that the kids should not know anything of the family budget. Many in fact try to keep money matters away from kids; they don't want to worry or involve the kids unnecessarily. The reality though is that kids should understand, to some extent, the family budget. If things are tight, kids should know this and learn to respect this. Giving children a false sense of financial freedom can spoil them and make them disregard the value of this resource.

 

Teach the kids how to save their own money, also. They can start with birthday and Eed money. Let them manage their own money with your guidance. Show them how to save by prioritizing their wants and desires. And more importantly, teach them to be patient. Let them know that even you have to wait before you can buy something that you really want. They should realize that money is not infinite and that it is hard earned.

 

In Islam, there is some spending of money that actually increases one's wealth. This is charity. Giving money in the form of charity does not diminish one's wealth. On the contrary, Allah will increase it multifold and make you richer for it. Giving charity is also one way to set a good example. When you go to a masjid or to a fundraising dinner, give so your children see it and let them even be a part of it.

 

As your children grow and mature, they will continue to learn their money-management skills from you. Be aware of this and even if you are not telling them on a daily basis what you have bought and how much you have saved, realize that they are watching. Be sure that what they see is what you want them to imitate.