Ramadan avoiders anonymous

25/06/2014| IslamWeb

Holidays come in two shades: the inane, just-have-fun holidays like the April Fools’ and New Year’s days; and relatively significant holidays, like Mother’s Day and Thanksgiving Day.

For us –Muslims- our holidays of 'Eed fall in the latter category because they are days of celebration that cap periods of intense worship. Historically, holidays, which is traced to ‘holy days, used to be days taken off from work to focus on spiritual and religious activities. So, could not Ramadan be also considered a holiday?

Well, we would not quite use that word to describe it. We all know Ramadan is no holiday. And it is not just because its days are spent in fasting and its nights in prayer offering. It is the fact that it is that for a whole month.

So, while every other holiday requires of us a rare gift for mom or hosting a onetime fabulous turkey feast, and helps us in feeling atoned till next year, Ramadan offers no shortcut to salvation. It is 29 or 30 days, take it or leave it.

But, it is not just about the perks involved with short holidays that make it easier to commemorate than a 30- day one. It is not because the spirit only lasts for a brief time or that shorter events are easier to plan. It is because it is easier to dress up in a disguise for a while than to actually stay like that for a month.

That explains why Ramadan often reminds me of addiction. Throughout our lives, we follow patterns of alternately destructive and tolerable behavior. But when the destructive part overpowers us, it takes a jarring moment or an intensive rehabilitation program to wean us off of the habit we have formed. And until that happens, addictions either go unnoticed or are deliberately overlooked.

So, how exactly do Ramadan and addiction tie together again? The truth is, though we may never like to characterize ourselves as having fallen victim to a disorder as damaging as addiction, we are actually so attached to our worldly activities that we have a hard time letting go of them. Within us reside a love toward, and ties to, them which, if unbound, would make us feel empty; it is the addiction to our lives that has made it so difficult for many of us to embrace Ramadan as we do any other special occasion.

Nobody will admit to feeling apprehension as Ramadan nears, of drawing back from their normal routines, not for a one-day holiday hiatus, but a month. And, come 'Eed day, even if they do manage to pull off a remarkable 180 just for Ramadan, they are back at it once more, even if they know they shouldn’t be.

And such are symptoms of addiction: not admitting one’s susceptibility to it or acknowledging one’s dependence, as well as believing no real change is warranted or can be made.

The more I read about addiction, the more it explained our attitudes toward Ramadan, until I came across some scientists stating addiction as a malfunctioning of the brain even when the addict is not actively using the drug, for instance. Previously, addiction had always been conclusively thought of as a state of mind which one can break free from if one has the will to overpower it. With these new findings, many who tend to blame fate for the way they are could now also point to the wirings of their brain cells.

But, if the three most expensive addictions— drugs, smoking and alcohol— which cost addicts in the US more than 400 billion dollars annually (Forbes), are of any indication, those first few cigarettes and beers are mostly taken of one’s own volition. Maybe addiction is worsened by substances that affect the chemical formation of the body, but it is deepened only by our own doing and by the weakness in our determination to change.

So, unless we seek withdrawal from our addiction to our lives through the rehabilitation Ramadan offers, our desire to continue the path downhill makes us worse off. Allah, The Most Exalted, Says (what means):

“Those who strive for Us— We will surely guide them to Our ways. And indeed, Allah is with the doers of good.” [Quran 29:69]

Only when we realize we need and want to let Ramadan detoxify us from the lifestyles we are addicted to, will Allah help us see the way to recovery.