I Wish to Sincerely Repent to Allah The Almighty

I Wish to Sincerely Repent to Allah The Almighty

Question

Assalaamu ‘Alaykum,
I am a twenty-three-year-old young man and unfortunately, I have been plagued for quite some time with the habit of masturbation, knowing that it is forbidden. You may wonder how I know that this act is forbidden and that I would be held accountable before Allah for it and be punished severely, yet I still do it.
The answer, sir, is that I have failed in my endeavors to get rid of this sin. My striving and inner struggle to curb my sexual desires has failed. I have left no stone unturned but all has been in vain so far. I have fasted as the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) advised: “… and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual desire.”
Alas, all my efforts have been futile. I have even fasted most of the days of the week during summer, but eventually succumbed to the urge to masturbate. I failed to curb my sexual desires. Sir, I did not strive for two weeks or a month or two to get rid of this sin, but I have been struggling with this problem for the past four years and maybe more.
When the month of Ramadan began, I intended to repent to Allah The Exalted sincerely from masturbation. I supplicated Allah The Exalted to enable me to make use of this blessed month and achieve my aim. However, alas, I fell into the abyss of sin during the month of Ramadan. Therefore, I was very frustrated and felt that I had wasted a blessed month and had gained nothing more than hunger and thirst.
Sir, I write to you after reaching a dead end. I cannot find a way out of this calamity. I am trying to tread the Straight Path, boost my commitment to Islamic teachings, and strive to curb my sexual desires, but committing this sin frustrates me. My prayers do not avail me. I know the evil and negative impact of this sin, but, as I clarified, I have failed to triumph over my desires.
Note that I cannot afford marriage as I am a fresh graduate and do not have a job. I want to repent to Allah The Almighty sincerely and I supplicate Him to bless me with sincere repentance, but I am still as I am, engrossed in sin. I am in pain and do not know the way out of this dilemma. I know that death comes abruptly, and I fear the punishment of Allah The Almighty.
Please advise me.
 
Answer
In the Name of Allah, The Most Merciful, The Ever Merciful
Dear brother,
Assalaamu ‘Alaykum,
It is a pleasure to welcome you to your very own website of consultations at Islamweb. We welcome your inquires about any topic at any time and implore Allah The Exalted to soften your heart, render your affairs easy for you, accept your repentance, grant you steadfastness and compensate you with obedience and satisfaction. We supplicate Him to replace your despair with hope, bless you with chastity, purity and closeness to Him.
Concerning your question, we would like to deliver the glad tidings that your eagerness to repent to Allah The Exalted, your striving to get rid of this sin, and your pain at your indulgence in this sin are all good and promising signs indicating the imminence of your triumph over your desires, Allah willing. These are the signs of sincere faith: to see the sinner in pain just like the patient who is striving to find the treatment for his malady. The sincere Muslim will not rest or savor tranquility until he quits committing sins and misdeeds. As long as you have this sincere intention and keenness to give up this sin, you will soon succeed, Allah willing.
It is important for you to keep on performing righteous deeds and acts of worship that you are doing, such as prayer, fasting and supplication. Bear in mind, dear brother, that if it were not for these acts of worship, you would have been embroiled to a greater extent and lost in committing graver sins and misdeeds. Therefore, you should keep up the good work to the best of your abilities. You should also do your best in performing extra worship acts and righteous deeds, supplicate your Lord regularly and implore Him to forgive your sins and accept your repentance. You should invoke the blessings and peace of Allah The Exalted upon the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allah exalt his mention ) more often. You should also avoid being alone for a long time or staying in the bathroom for a long time. Try keeping the door of your room open, whenever possible, and do not go to bed until you are sleepy.
 You should also recite more Thikr (words of remembrance and supplication) and seek the forgiveness of Allah The Almighty until you fall asleep. You should occupy yourself during the daytime with beneficial activities, even if they are physically tiring and arduous. In fact, it is even better if they are grueling. You can play sports that drain most of your physical energy. You can put some useful tapes by your bed [in order to listen to them before falling asleep]. You should also be keen to attend some religious events and lectures and memorize the Noble Quran, even a few verses a day. You can set a daily program to memorize the Noble Quran. Moreover, you should seek good companions to spend your free time with them. You should also strive to attend congregational prayers at the mosque.
You will be blessed with the acceptance of your repentance, Allah willing. You should seek refuge in Allah The Exalted, turn to Him and never despair.

May Allah grant us success.

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